Pride in Riches

     After a conversation with my confessor last week, I had some insight about pride being connected with gifts and talents, things that I think of as my strengths. I was reminded of Gospel passages about material riches that are equally applicable to intellect, character, and habit, and perhaps more so because it is easier to have blind spots in those areas.

     I have always been dismissive toward this interpretation (perhaps in part due to the corniness of the overused interlinguistic pun on the word "talent") but during this reflection I came to see it in a new light. I was walking back through the city and reflecting on this when an image from a book that I read recently came to me: water dripping onto a large rock and slowly eroding it. Water dissolving rock is not an uncommon metaphor for change that occurs slowly and imperceptibly, but it took on a new meaning for me from my experience in spiritual struggle with pride.

     Whenever I become aware of pride and motivated to struggle with it, I pull out a battering ram  to attack the solid rock and, quickly becoming tired and discouraged, abandon it shortly after. But grace in the spiritual life can be like drops of water - slow, but far more effective than the battering ram through persistence. The main challenge is to receive the drops as they come and not making a barrier that prevents them from reaching the stone.

     Novitiate is special because there is grace given that is different from any other time and because I am given the time to reflect on it and discern God's action in my life. It is time to watch the water work, pay attention to where the drops fall and how I receive them, and allow the accumulated silt of sins and faults to be carried away.